Short jokes

"Yo mama so skinny when she swallowed a meatball, everyone thought she was pregnant again."

Yo mama's so old, she was a waitress at the Last Supper.

Yo mama's so fat, she was overthrown by a small militia group, and now she's known as the Republic of Yo Mama.

Yo mama's so old, she knew Burger King when he was a prince.

Yo mama's so dumb, she trips over the wireless internet.

Yo mama's so stupid, when they said it was chilly outside, she grabbed a bowl.

What’s the best air to breathe if you want to be rich? Millionaire.

What do you call a man wearing a rug on his head? Matt.

What sits on the seabed and has anxiety? A nervous wreck.

What should you do if you meet a giant? Use big words.

Did you hear about the woman who couldn't stop collecting magazines? She had issues.

I wanted to take a bath, but decided to leave it where it is.

Once I read a book about glue.

I couldn't put it down.

Did you hear about the broken guitar for sale?

It comes with no strings attached.

Did you hear about the bossy man at the bar? He ordered everyone around.

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

Summer wasn't too bad either.

What do pigs use to clean up? Hogwash.

What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.

What kind of bug can tell time? A clock-roach.

How can you tell when a comic passes gas? Something smells funny.