Short jokes
Recently my baby did this:
🖕🏼👶🏼🖕🏼 🎽 👖
How is sex like air? It’s not a big deal unless you aren’t getting any.
I told my fam a joke.
They all looked at me weird and one person even said, "I’m sorry!"
I was playing laser tag with my ex, but I (wink) didn't realize I had a real gun.
What do you call a premature Chinese baby birth? Wong Tai-Ming.
I thought I saw a cool sticker on my office window, then I realized it was getting bigger and bigger.
Sister, can I see your two big rabbits?
I found this at school.
Son: Dad, where are you?
Dad: Getting another one.
Son: Getting what?
Dad: Dad.
How to get rid of your depression:
1. Stop self-pitying.
2. Realize you can't.
3. Fucking deal with it.
You're welcome.
Are you the Twin Towers? I can't stand you.
What do you call a Black-Asian dictator?
Kim Kong Coon.
I rate the atmosphere of Israel a 10/7; real good stuff there, looks like an actual movie!
What makes 9/11 an inside job?
Someone started calling it 10/7.
Uwuuuuu
Q. What do they call an ISIS terrorist who owns both a camel and a goat?
A. Bisexual.
Why do women always have sex with the lights off?
Because they never like to see a man having a good time.
Politics.
The last two presidents of the US.
I like your cut, G.
*Slaps really hard*
BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-