Short jokes

I set fiya to the rain! Wait, no, that ain't possible, what... I evaporated the rain!

How do you cook macaroni? With a shark-spoon-a-rooni!

I would have told you a cheesy pun, but it was too cheesy. *picks up cheeses*

I was in a maze and I got to the end and they congratulated me. I said that was a-maze-ing!

Hey Jonny, you can buy a...

Pun o' chips at the store!

What did the man say when he swallowed a clock and tried to go to the bathroom?

WATCH OUT!!!

A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

The earth is flat.

What do you call a dancing cow that dies while dancing?

Dead mooves.

"Jingle bells, Osama smells."

Jasper likes little girls and Bin Laden.

What was Osama's favourite food... yer nan?

What type of pizza did the 9/11 victims order? Two planes.

My friend's mother thought a kid who had autism and Down syndrome called him a "double down."

Two deer walk out of a gay bar. One says to the other, "I blew like 20 bucks in there!"

Have you heard about the lemming that jumped off a cliff into an ocean?

I heard it was because of pier pressure.

Me and my friends were telling puns. My teacher said we should be “pun-ished.”

Yahahlmsyw.

That stand for:

You are has a whole, let me show you why.

Did you know that whenever I read my blood donor ID?

Because it says "B Positive!"

If you shoot at a school of fish, could you call it a school shooting?