Short jokes
What kind of woman does Bill Cosby like the most?
The “cold and passed out” kind.
What did Freddie Mercury use to improve his hearing?
Hearing AIDS.
Trying to make a baby talk is like trying to negotiate with North Korea.
Cremation,
The last chance for a smoking hot body.
Yeah, not too bad at all, really.
I bought my blind friend a house on the edge of a cliff.
They died of happiness and a 30 story fall.
I put the D in Children.
If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What's Hitler's favorite Yu-Gi-Oh card?
BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON
What do retarded cops give tickets for?
Going over 45 in a potato zone.
Penis.
Two baby seals walk into a club.
How many hookers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One, cause they'll screw anything.
How do trees calculate square roots? They use log-arithms.
Dracula was invited to a BBQ. He got stake.
I drank some dye before, but don't worry, I've only dyed a little inside.
What does Jonathan Davis eat for breakfast?
Korn Flakes.
What makes suicide illegal?
Getting caught.
What's green and sings?
Elvis Parsley!
What do you call dynamite on steroids? - High Explosive.