Short jokes
I had a dream about a car, and I woke up exhausted.
A dung beetle walks into a bar and says to another beetle, "Is this stool taken?"
What's hot and hard?
Me when I look at children.
Black dog is gay.
How do cows laugh?
Moo-haha.
Why is Hugh's mum so fucking fat?
Because she ate the 34 other kids she had but now only has 6,789.
How do you circumsize a hillbilly?
Kick his mother in the jaw
What do you call a cow grazing a field with 50% grass and 50% weed?
High steaks gambling.
What do city plumbers and pedophiles have in common?
They both lay pipes in public parks.
So three retards walk into a classroom...
Sike, it was the garbage. They mistook it for their classroom.
Did you hear about the light bulb party? Yeah, it was pretty lit!
A girl named Rebecca was friends with a guy called Fi. One day, Fi hit Rebecca, and Rebecca lost service.
Rebecca said to Fi, "Why-Fi?"
What did the Pokemon lover say when he got to the shoe store?
I have to Pikashoe.
What's the hardest thing about being a rapist?
My dick.
Hey! Some idiot drew a cat on this pillar! Wait... does that make it a caterpillar?
I got hit in the head with a can of soda yesterday. Luckily for me, it was a soft drink.
What is Beyonce's favorite fast food chain?
dairy QUEEEEEEENNNN!
If a cat hits you with her tail, is it considered being pussy whipped?
The invention of the shovel was groundbreaking.
What type of apple grows on a tree?
All of them.