Short jokes
There was a math teacher on a plane that crashed. What was the last thing that went through their head?
A pentagon!
(9/11 joke)
What hood do zombies come from?
Dead Ends.
I'm ticked off by this tick joke!
This rat did the most amazing thing ever; it was pretty radical, dude.
Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
He had nobody to go with.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his ass.
I've been going to the dentist for a while now, I know the drill.
Who is the biggest slut in the world? Ms. Pacman, because you give her 25 cents and she swallows balls until she dies.
I went outside to catch some dog, but I mist.
Space therapist in between the e and the r.
The rapists!
Why are most West Virginians going to hell?
Their favorite pastimes (inbreeding and bestiality) are an abomination unto the Lord.
Why didn’t Harry Potter use the chamber to teach Dumbledore’s army?
Because at one point poisonous gases were put in it.
What turns green to red in a flick of a switch?
A frog in a blender.
What's the most delicious city in the world? Hamburg.
You should never try Afghan weed because people in Afghanistan get stoned to death.
What is 6" long, bright red, and your wife cries when you feed it to her?
Her miscarriage.
Three gay guys walk into a bar.
There is only one stool left, what do they do?
They flip the stool over.
What do you call a skeleton with no bones? A boneless boy.
What's the difference between me and a bus?
I'm not on fire...
What’s the difference between a Ferrari and a sack of dead babies?
I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage.