Short jokes
What did Jim say to Jeff?
"I killed your ham."
What’s a sheep’s favorite song?
"Baby Don’t Herd Me."
I hate it when people say to suck it up... I mean, sometimes I don’t want someone’s dick in my face.
Ligma.
Balls.
What do you say to a woman with two black eyes?
Nothing, you've told her twice.
At weddings, old people tell kids, "You're next!"
At funerals, little kids tell old people, "You're next!"
What did Yoda say to Luke during his wedding ceremony?
"May divorce be with you."
Why did the koala fall out of the tree?
Because it died.
Why did Princess Di cross the road?
Momentum.
"Don’t be dumb, make sure she’s numb."
- Bill Cosby
What's the worst thing about eating a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
Stan JoJo Siwa.
How did I escape from Iraq, Iran?
What do you call a dog with no legs?
...You can't call it anything. It won't come to you.
Don’t you just wanna hang around, like Chester?
Okay, so basically I'm monky.
My life, your life, and your sister is a slut.
When you’re hunting at a forest resort and you shoot a deer, but then you remember that there are no deer at the forest resort.
I like my women like I like my steak...
Bloody.
You are about to hear the funniest joke ever.
My life.