Short jokes
Why can't you fool an aborted fetus?
Because it wasn't born yesterday.
What can a rock possibly say?
Answer: I'll fuck ya mum rock hard.
What do you get if you talk to a Down syndrome person face to face at close distance?
Soaked...
What's the difference between a penis and a gun?
A child doesn't cry when a gun goes off in its mouth.
What's the difference between me and cancer?
My dad didn't beat cancer.
Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?
No? Neither did he.
My blind friend got ran over by a parked car.
Skedaddle skedoodle, I'm gonna go beat my noodle.
Have you heard about the blind man who saw the accident and the dead man who heard it?
I wasn’t understanding what I had to do for homework, so my teacher said, “Let me break it down for you like the Twin Towers.”
1273. Depression got the best of me. I'm gonna cry in my room now.
Q: What is the difference between a stripper and a bungee cord?
A: It's cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you're pretty much screwed.
Stop with the blind jokes... I don't see the point.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They wanted someone to call "daddy."
What's the hardest part of eating bald pussy? Pulling the diapers back up when you're done!
Q: How do you get the retard kid out of the tree?
A: Wave at him.
How can you tell if a Polish woman is on the rag? One of her socks is missing!
What danger does this put them in? Toxic Sock Syndrome!
Wanted to get the scoop on history of ice cream, so I went to Sunday school.
Egg?
What's the best thing about taking a shower with a 12 year old Philippino girl?
If you slick her hair back, she looks 10.