Short jokes
Why did the kids love the mushrooms?
Because they're fun-guys!
What do you call a pineapple in a pun?
A Puneapple.
When my friend eats a mint, I say, "Hey, is it mint to be sweet?"
You know, people always say your life is worth it, but with me, it's worth-it-less.
What's both red, white and sometimes purple?
My arms...
At every funeral, it's a try-not-to-say-"big mood"-challenge for me.
What's white and bloody?
Two doves in a trash compactor. Talk about a failed marriage.
If Italy attacked France from the rear, would Greece help?
Ya, I have a Hydro Flask.
H: My Y: Grandpa D: Sticks R: His O: Cock F: Up L: My A: Ass S: K:
If the average male walks 1.7 miles a day, then why did my dad take 13 years to get the milk?
Where do you go to get the best fish?
A restaurant on the Titanic.
What do you do when an orphan gets you mad?
A stab to the neck and a bullet to the face.
Why did the scientist want to take off his doorbell?
Because he wanted to win the no-bell prize.
I say "cow poop," cows say "moonure."
What did the cow say when it wanted to go to the movies? -- "Let's go to the moovies!"
I would tell you my jokes about pogs, but they would eventually get too boar-ing.
What step did the DNA not take in his math equation?
He forgot to adenine!
Africa.
What's the difference between Stephen and a car? A car loses oil, Stephen loses the ability to walk.
What’s the difference between Burger King and Ron Jeremy?
BK doesn’t sell real meat.