What does a deaf person do when they hear people scream? I don't know; it's not like they're gonna hear it anyway.
Short Jokes
What time is it? It's time for lunch.
*Quoted by Bubble Guppies*
What did the cow say to your mom?
Hello.
If two vegetarians get into a fight, is it still called a beef?
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"Knock knock!"
"Who's there?"
"Baby!"
"Baby who?"
"Do you want to eat this baby that I have prepared?"
"No thanks, I already ate."
Q. What's the difference between people and a toilet?
A. Neither does R. Kelly.
Howard Stern rules, b*tches!
Q: Who are the fastest readers in the world?
A: New Yorkers. Some of them go through 110 stories in 5 seconds.
Trump's cabinet are like panties. Some crawl up your butt, some snap under pressure, and some actually cover your butt when you need them.
What do you get when you eat a hamburger?
Mustard gas.
I am the joke.
My bro said food was cool. So I threw a piece of cool chicken at him. For some reason, he hit me, OOF.
Why did the skeleton go to jail?
Because he was bad to the bone!
Submit a joke :-)
Your love life.
Doctor: You don't have long to live. 10...
Patient: Ten what? Ten years, ten months?
Doctor: 9... 8... 7...
I don't understand the plane crash at 9/11. My dad was a great pilot!
What's a convict's favorite song?
"I want to break free."
I called the suicide hotline in Saudi Arabia. They got excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
If your parents ever accuse you of lying... Say, "You're the one who told me about Santa Claus!"