What do you do when an orphan gets you mad?
A stab to the neck and a bullet to the face.
Short Jokes
Why did the scientist want to take off his doorbell?
Because he wanted to win the no-bell prize.
I say "cow poop," cows say "moonure."
What did the cow say when it wanted to go to the movies? -- "Let's go to the moovies!"
I would tell you my jokes about pogs, but they would eventually get too boar-ing.
What step did the DNA not take in his math equation?
He forgot to adenine!
Africa.
What's the difference between Stephen and a car? A car loses oil, Stephen loses the ability to walk.
What’s the difference between Burger King and Ron Jeremy?
BK doesn’t sell real meat.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Tank.
Tank who?
You're welcome.
A man walks into a store and orders 2 large chips. They give them to him and he says:
"I ordered 2 large chips, not 100 little ones!"
Kid: Hey, what’s black and sneaky!
Social studies teacher: Harriet Tubman.
To whoever stole my antidepressants, I hope you are happy now.
How to get 1000 followers on Instagram?
Run through Africa with a bottle of water.
When you ask your sister if she wanna smash, but then she grabs the Switch.
Colder than the conversation between a fat guy and a Super Model...
My name is Caleb, and I like boo and eat it.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side! Haha, so funny...
Why was Stephen Hawking's wife mad at him?
She caught him having an affair with his shoulder.
At night, before I got in bed with my girl, I had 206 bones, but I developed a 207th bone.
