Short jokes
Why was the orphan able to avoid getting into trouble at school?
Because they couldn’t call his parents!
How do you fit a whale inside a car? A blender.
I slit my wrists.
Your mom: Your plate is full, that's enough food on your plate.
Me: My plate is not full, I still see the white of the plate.
Why do dwarfs laugh when they run a race? Because the grass tickles their balls.
What do you call roller skates you can walk in?
"Wock n' roll."
What do you call a hippopotamus that stands out from the crowd?
A hipster!
Why can't an orphan make a YouTube channel?
'Cause they can't make it family friendly.
If you bet on Russian roulette, even if you win, you still lose.
What are the four seasons?
Salt, Pepper, Sugar, and Flour.
McDonald's worker: Order, order!
Customer: I didn't do anything wrong!
What's strong enough for a man but made for a woman?
The back of my hand.
Why can't Jesus play hockey?
He keeps getting nailed to the boards.
What did the dentist say to the butt?
"That's the largest cavity I've ever seen!"
Why is the orphan so dumb?
Because he didn’t have parents to pay for it.
JFK was one of the most open-minded presidents. It really blows my mind how great he was.
Why do orphans go to church on family day? cuz they get to spend time with their father.
My dads just like my eggs... runny. 🤣😭🥺
What’s the difference between a Hispanic and a stoner?
A stoner has papers.
Why did the octopus cross the road?
'Cause he was on the same side as a sushi restaurant.