Short jokes
I'm not sure how I'm going to get to Heaven.
God had not built a ramp yet... or an escalator.
What’s ten feet long and bald?
The conga line in the cancer ward.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He drove too far away from the power point/modem.
Did you know the letter "F" in orphan stands for family?
So I was at high school one day in the bathrooms, and I'm circumcised, and the kid next to me wasn't, so he showed me his pp, and he had a foreskin, so I was just playing with it until the teacher walked in, then I got fired...
What do a Make-A-Wish kid and mosquitoes have in common?
They both got a 10% survival rate...
What goes up but never past the digits 15?
A Make-A-Wish kid...
China wants their name on everything but the m.f. virus.
Why are fish not sleeping? 'Cause the bed is wet.
So my son came up to me and said, "Hey, Dad, I’m hungry." So I replied "Hi, Hungry, I’m Dad."
And then I feed him my dick.
What's the hardest part about sex with a Thai girl?
Her, probably.
What is white, black, and red and can't fit through a revolving door?
A nun with a spear through her head!
What's an orphan's least favorite joke?
... YO MAMA SOO, Oh wait...
Why can’t orphans build computers?
They don’t know where to put the motherboard.
A man walked into a toilet and saw a woman fingering a man and said, "I think you're doing it wrong." Turns out it was two transvestites.
Why did the Titanic sink? It loved the iceberg!
When I was on the Titanic, I got broken.
I don't want to date an alien.
Barney-1 2 3 what number comes next?
Barney-that’s right it’s penis!
Why couldn't Stephen Hawking pass? Because he couldn't pass "I'm not a robot" test.