Short jokes
How do you eat a cake?
With a fork!
What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you?
“C'mon, did ya really think I’d resist arrest?”
Are you corona? Cuz it’s hard to breathe around you ;)
Why did Helen Keller’s boyfriend have wax on his finger? Because he was whispering sweet nothings into her ear!
Cyber Monday
Hi 👋, was the day you?
I weeee is?
What is the richest planet?
Saturn 🪐- It has many rings.
I got in touch with my inner self today, it's the last time I use 1-ply toilet roll.
Are the three little pigs orphans because their mom kicked them out of the house?
A kid asks his father, "How long is our trip, Dad?"
The kid's father says, "Our trip is a Fortnite."
Damn, bitch, you got a big ass for a head!
Why did the man cross the road?
Because his dick was stuck in the chicken!
What is the giant's synonyms?
Fi, fo, fum.
I was just sitting down when all of a sudden she screamed, "Help!"
Hillary for president.
I was going to tell a joke about babies, but I decided to abort.
Why don't Bald Eagles like fast food? It always runs away!
Wood fired pizza?
How's pizza gonna pay child support now?! :O
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What's a fish's least favorite instrument?
A ClariNET!