Short jokes
Is Google a girl or a boy?
Obviously a girl, because it won't let you finish a sentence without making a suggestion.
Fart <3
Tried to kill myself today using a bungee cord, I kept ALMOST dying.
Why did people bully the burning circuit?
It was too short.
Why did the MOSFET go to jail?
It had a charge for battery.
What's the difference between meat and fish?
If you beat your fish, it'll die.
How did the security guard at the orchid get better at his job? He got an Apple Watch.
What do you call a sad strawberry?
A blueberry.
Why do orphans use iPhone X's?
Because they can't find home.
It's ice to see you.
Why do people have sex?
Because they like going "Ahhhhhhhhhhh fuck me, bitch, I love you!"
What do you call a bee that lives in America? A USB.
If sex before marriage is a sin, is sex after marriage cos or tan?
Nnnbgfdddddrr.
What do you think of your mom? I have to go now and tyyyytt.
EMMETT BROWN IS FAT.
My best friend said, "Can you put your dick in me?" I said, "Can I cum in you?"
What do you call a night guard at the glory hole inside a adult bookstore?
Guardian of the confessional booth.
What kind of tree fits into your hand? A palm tree.
I went up to a kid and asked, "Are you an orphan?" They said, "Yes, what gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."