Bully: Your mom gay.
Me: There's something on your chin.
Bully: Where?
Me: No, on your fourth one.
Short Jokes
Your mama so fat the flash died halfway running around her.
Me: Imagine not having hair.
Kids: On chemo.
Bitch the fuck.
Corona be like:
Eliminating half the population of boomers faster than Thanos.
*snap*
You can't put an orphan on house arrest if there isn't a house to arrest them to.
Why did the boy put a chicken 🐔 in his garden?
He wanted to grow an eggplant. 😂
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Lion 🦁.
Lion who?
Lion again, aren't you?
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you going to the movies tonight?
What do you do when you finish a magazine at a hospital?
Reload and keep shooting.
We hired this boy to pick up dog poop. We just remembered that we don't have a dog.
A man walks into a bar and orders a stiff drink. I gave him a glass of ice.
Imagine if on April first the government says, "Hahhaha, you all fell for it. Covid-19 is fake; we actually killed all those people, lol."
What's the difference between fathers and hurricanes?
Nothing. They both destroy families and then leave for a couple of years.
My fish puns aren't on porpoise.
Why did the toilet paper not make it across the street?
'Cause it got stuck in a pothole!
Poop backwards is poop. 💩
What did Batman do when he went shopping?
Got ham!
Is your middle name Fancy Feast?
'Cause your face looks like a can of dog food.
What’s the difference between me and Chester Bennington?
I know how to use an exercise band.
Two cunts were walking down the street.
One was doing calculus, and the other one says, "Imagine me, a stupid cunt that can talk...."
