Short jokes
What did the cactus look like with his tuxedo on?
Sharp! 🤣
What do you call an octopus with eight legs? An octo-pussy!
How does NASA fart?
They fart with their ass-teroids.
What do you call an act of “funny” discipline? A PUN-ishment!
One day I asked my mom where kids came from. She said the man who went to the milk store.
Five years later, he came back and left again.
I sat down and wrote a joke.
Today sucked. My friend fell off a cliff, and I went to jail.
I would tell you a good joke, but I can’t, so here is a bad one.
I would tell you a joke about a teacher, but she’d kill you at school.
Everyone says Kenny has an easy life.
I disagree. I hear his mom likes complicated sex positions.
Your mom's so heavy that it caused Atlas, the Titan, to slip a disc.
What do a fisherman and a prostitute have in common?
They're both hookers.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
My asian neighbors dinner.
My favorite website.
What is a porn star's favourite potato crisp flavour...
Prawn cocktail.
Why is a pro fighter like a fisher?
They both can throw a hook.
Why did Helen Keller have no ornaments on her Christmas tree?
'Cause she always dropped them.
Did you know that Helen Keller had a twin?
Yeah, Helen ate her in the womb.
Q: Where did Helen Keller go to school?
A: Anywhere she was homeschooled.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Covid.
Covid who?
The thing that killed half a billion people!
Grandpa's last words: "Why do you have a chainsaw?"