Short jokes
I miss understood that, Miss Understood.
"Guys! Let’s hang out after school!"
Dude named Guys:
Dude named Out:
Dude named School:
Who gave Jesus his birthday presents every year?
Santa Claus!
America... Amefrica... Amfrica... Africa...
What to say to a single guy who's insulting you: "Shut up, you horny virgin!"
Why did the condom cross the road?
Because he was pissed off.
What is the difference between the assassination of César and the assassination of Jesus?
They were both killed by Romans.
Mom told me drugs are my enemies.
Jesus said to like your enemies.
Yay, I can like drugs then!
NASA equals nugget and sh*t, amateur.
What was Jesus scared of the most?
Snails.
What was Jesus's favorite food?
Answer: Snails
How did Jesus kill himself?
He fell from his bike.
How many times did he die?
Once on a bike and once when he fell from a cloud in Heaven.
Why can’t orphans have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy."
My grandpa's last words were, "Why is there a body in my kitchen?"
No witnesses.
What's the grossest mission NASA could do?
Probing Uranus.
I love murder shows... wish me luck cause I'm kinda hoping to be on one one day.
What did the cactus look like with his tuxedo on?
Sharp! 🤣
What do you call an octopus with eight legs? An octo-pussy!
How does NASA fart?
They fart with their ass-teroids.
What do you call an act of “funny” discipline? A PUN-ishment!