Short jokes
Teachers at a school shooting be like: damn it. That's the third one this week and it's only Monday.
What were the terrorist of 9/11 thinking?
We can’t go over it, we can’t go under it, we'll have to go through it.
You and me went up to stab your father. He was out, do not pout. They are coming after.
What did Superman say to Batman?
Nothing, Bruce is dead.
I want to make a joke about Kobe, but it won't land well.
I need more webs and I need more supplies for more webs, how do I make them? With spiders!
What do you call Cap and Spider-Man? Spider-America!
I'm shocked, my new toaster isn't waterproof.
He only won the election because of rigging.
82 million votes my ass.
Ask me for proof.
Why did the cow lick your mum?
Because she had a cream pie.
I'm stumped.
Q: Why do birds need feathers?
A: To cover up their butt quack!
Q. What is the Titanic's favorite food?
A. Ice burger.
Your mom is so fat, they asked if she was a sumo wrestler.
Nobody:
Michael Jackson: giving kids a free cream pie.
What did the orphan's friend give him for his birthday?
Lego, so he can build a home.
You know why Ted Cruz left Texas?
Because they never take a chill pill.
Why is the ocean so salty?
Because the land doesn't wave back! 🤣
9: I am higher than you.
8: No, you're not!
(8 flips to his side)
I got kicked outta the poker game.
They said I was a little cheetah.