Shoes jokes
My sister told me only onions make you cry, so I always hit her back when she hit me, but I hit her with a shoe only to catch her cry.
What type of sandals do frogs wear?
Open-toed.
Bro, I gave a suicidal kid Nikes... he just did it, lol.
1, 2 buckle my shoe.
3, 4 buckle some more.
5, 6 Nike kicks.
1, 2 buckle my shoe.
3, 4 open the door.
5, 6 Nike kicks.
My friend and I were at the mall and decided to try on some necklaces. He said, "I think you should get the one over there." I do. I look at my friend and he’s wearing one with a little extra length so you can adjust it. I asked him, "Did you just break away from your owner to upgrade to clothes and shoes?"
With the sentence "Die in hell," you can buy shoes in Germany.
What do you call an emo kid with light-up shoes? A human chandelier.
Q: How do you get a squirrel to like you? A: Act like a nut! 😂
Q: Why don't eggs tell jokes? A: Because they'd crack each other up.
Son: Dad, can you put my shoes on? Dad: No, son, I don't think they would fit me.
I'm on a seafood diet. When I see food, I eat it.
I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.
My name is Dan, I wear white Vans, I have a gun, get in the van!
Good night, sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite, and if they do, hit them with a shoe till they're all black and blue!
Roses are red, violets are blue,
I’m sorry you look like my old beat up shoe.
When you're having a normal day at school, but then...
"All the other kids with the pumped up kicks"
Have you seen Dolly Parton's new shoes? Neither has she!
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N. Oh my gosh, I'm peeing on my shoe, no one knows about it yet!
What do you call super expensive shoes?
Cashews.
Why did Jeffrey get blood on his shoe?
Because this teen just started her period!
My dogs pooped in my shoes? Pooper.
One day, during lunch, a Spanish kid came up to my other friend and asked her questions in Spanish, and when she was about to say something, I popped out and said, “GO AWAY OR I WILL SUE YOU WITH BRIANNA’S SEVEN/7 LAWYERS!!!!(AKA, her seven/7 shoes.)”
I need to get new shoes; one of these isn’t right.
Notice on a shoe repair shop: I’ll heel you, I’ll save your sole, I’ll even gladly dye for you.