Shoes jokes

What is a kidnapper’s favorite shoe?

White Vans.

Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory?

Many soles were lost.

What did the rapper say to his shoes?

"You better lace up!"

If the shoe doesn't fit, there's no evidence.

What are an orphan's favorite shoes?

White Vans.

Notice on a shoe repair shop: I’ll heel you, I’ll save your sole, I’ll even gladly dye for you.

What did the Pokemon lover say when he got to the shoe store?

I have to Pikashoe.

A B C D E F G.

Gummy bears are chasing me, one is red, one is blue. One is chewing up my shoe. Now I'm running for my life because the red one's got a knife!

What do you call a Chinese man with one leg? Tie one shoe.

What’s an orphan’s least favorite shoe?

Fuller House😂

What did the tissue wear?

A shoe.

Did you hear Palpatine is sewing Nike?

Stole his slogan, just do it!

Bro, I gave a suicidal kid Nikes... he just did it, lol.

What do frogs wear for shoes? Open toad.

What does your mom say to you? "Love you, moody."

Women are like dogs...

"Where are you going? Where are you going? Where are you going?"

"Can I come? Can I come? Can I come?"

"I'll wait right here... I'll wait right here... I'll wait right here..."

SHOES

I talk with a friend about something and there comes Quandangle, things with his shoes, and I'm just like, "Bro, what the heeeeel?"

How does Hitler tie his shoes? With little Nazis.

1, 2 buckle my shoe.

3, 4 buckle some more.

5, 6 Nike kicks.

1, 2 buckle my shoe.

3, 4 open the door.

5, 6 Nike kicks.

Ah, son of a bitch, I got the truth stuck on my shoe?!?!

The truth: Breast feeding is like having long sex with your baby. God dammit, I hate the truth!

What a school shooter's favorite song?

"Pumped Up Kicks."