Shes jokes

Your Mom is so friking fat, that when she ripped her pants and went to the seamster, they said, "We don't sew curtains!"

My girlfriend’s dog died, so I bought her another, identical one.

She just screamed at me and said: “What am I meant to do with two dead dogs?!?”

What was Helen Keller's favorite game when she was a kid?

I spy.

Yo mama is so fat, when she was a spy, she was called "double obese."

What does a beaten woman do when she comes home from the hospital?

Dishes if she knows what's good for her health.

Yo mama so ugly, she the real reason all the dodos died.

When you tell her you are about to "COME," she says no, don't, please just keep going.

Shenron: THAT IS BEYOND MY POWER.

Your momma's so fat, when she pulls her knickers down, her ass is still in 'em!

Yo momma's so fat, she rolled out the bed, out the room, down the stairs, smashed through the window, rolled down the road, and got stuck in the Grand Canyon.

Everyone makes mistakes. Like my mom, she made a mistake 13 years ago.

My mom is telling me to get off Friday Night Funkin' or she will slam my head against the keyboard: weherhrqqkh[qokqho[krq3[t4i2-4q43q343q44334q43.

Listen, if my mom sees me on Roblox at 3 a.m., she said she would bang my head against the keyboardndfndfnnckvnksdvknkdsfnvbfw.

Yo mama so dumb, when she looked at the light, she said, "Why is the sun so close to me?"

Last night I had sex and she said, "Stop talking about s***, OMG!" and I made her scream so loud she said, "Her balls hurt!"

What's the difference between a God and my mom?

My mom exists. I mean... she did at one point! Unlike any "Gods."

One day, a lady and her husband were talking and it was time for dinner. He got up and sat at the dining room table, and the lady brought the plate of food in and she sat it down in front of him. "What's this?" he said. The lady said, "A piece of shit...honey! Want some water to drink?"

I will unplug your life support to kill my mum and then give her blood so she can bleed more.

I will unplug your life support to kill my mum and give her it so she can bleed more.

Your mom was so fat that she couldn't have a man and couldn't go through the door.

I'M JOKING, DON'T GET MAD!

Yo momma so fat that when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the floor cracked up.