Shes

Shes jokes

Orphan

Why did the orphan call her boyfriend "daddy"?

Because she wanted that D.

Sally

Knock knock?

Who's there?

Not Sally, she doesn’t have any arms.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She doesn’t have any arms.

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus.

Comedian

My mom said she wanted to be a comedian when she grows up. So after she was an adult, she had kids. When they were old enough, she told them you could be whatever you want...

Memes

Mama

Yo mama so fat that she needs 12 queen size mattresses to go to sleep.

Mom

Your mom is so fat that she works as a hydraulic press in a car factory!

Mum

Your mum so fat that when she sat down she said, "Why are there so many people under me?"

Girl

What is the best thing about an 18-year-old girl in the shower?

Slick her hair back, she looks 15.

Exam

Why did Sally fail her final exam?

Because she had nothing written down.

Mother

Roses are red, Violets are blue... I fucked your mother's ass, and she had you.

Orphan

Random kid: Yo mama so stupid that she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.

Orphan: What's a mama?

Random kid: *shook*

Cancer

My aunt's star sign was Cancer, so it's pretty ironic how she died...

She was eaten by a giant crab.

Orphan

The teacher once said to some students, "I was an orphan before your principal hired me."

The students said, "Oof, that is sad."

The teacher tried to ignore them and take attendance. She said, "Is anyone missing?"

The students said, "Your parents."

The teacher got offended and later that day quit her job.

Job

What did they call Susan B. Anthony when she was sleeping on the job?

Snoozin' B. Anthony!

Mama

Yo mama is so fat when she sees a bus full of white people, she thinks it's a Twinkie, lmao xd.

Boyfriend

What is a kind thing to say to someone and what is a rude thing to say to someone?

Kind thing to say to someone: You are the most perfect you there is. Your outlook on life is amaz- (BLAH, BLAH, BLAH ENOUGH!)

Rudist thing to say too someone: You more uglyer than my mama's boyfriend. You are a son of a b word! Okay that is so much rude and why you can say that to a tree but anyway not the point. Bonus: The world's most weirdest name to say to a girl, is Nutter butter, we know that's a weird *and* stupid name because she is not nutter or butter she is a person not a thing! Oh well bye!!!!

Football Game

A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench.

After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. "Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."

Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?"

"Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!' I'm like, hello? It's only 25 cents!"