Shes jokes

Hey, I got some Domino's pizza, salad, breadsticks, and chicken wings for everyone. Yeah, but make sure Ms. Mandingo gorilla don't eat all up, because if she do, I'm going have to shove it up her fur.

Yo mama so stupid, when I said, "Go deep," she dug a hole in the field.

My sister and I were hanging out when she opened her drawer and pulled out 3 condoms and said, "Pick one."

Yo mama so fat, she got arrested for carrying 100 pounds of crack.

My math teacher walked by and asked me, "What is that?"

I said, "Paper."

She said, "Really?"

I said, "Yeah, do you need glasses?"

Beth was from Spain and she had a pig. What did they call her?

Beth-la-ham

These cannibal kids come running into the cave and ask their mom what's for dinner? She says, "Dad's gonna grill wieners!"

Your mama is so fat, she only knows three words: KFC.

My friend's daughter is taking a job in California parking cars. She says she wants to be a valet girl. For sure. For sure.

I went on a date last night and told my date I worked with animals every day.

She said, "Oh, how sweet. What do you do?" I said, "I'm a butcher."

Q: What’s the worst thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl?

A: You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.

About to go on a date.

But she was late.

So I got some tape.

And eventually punished her with rape.

A week before Christmas my wife left me. She said I was too selfish and full of myself and she could not take it anymore.

On Christmas Eve, Santa asked me what I wanted for Christmas and I said, "All I want is the one I love more than anyone else in the world."

On Christmas morning I woke up in a box under my Christmas tree.

Yo mama's so fat, she irons her clothes on the driveway.

Yo mama so fat, when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the concrete laughed up.

I told my sister a Dairy joke.

She said it was cheesy.

Yo mama is so fat, she got mixed up with Godzilla!

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.

She looked at me surprised.

(P.S. I am not at that age plus I am as straight as a helix ruler.)

What do you call the longest reigning monarch?

The queen? No, she dead.

I was at a funeral and told a joke, and my sister said, "I'm dead." So I said, "That's what she said."