She jokes
Why did Annie fall from the swing?
Because she had no hands.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not Annie.
Your mum is so fat that when she wore a yellow coat people called taxi!
What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?
She choked.
What does a woman do when she leaves the battered women's shelter?
"Cook my dinner, if she knows what's good for her."
My last relationship ended because my ex-girlfriend accused me of being a rapist. I'm not upset. To be honest, I didn't like her anyway. She kept telling me I never listen, or something like that.
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? She will let it go.
I know this isn't the real chicken wing song, but my version...
"Chicken wing, chicken wing, I want your mommy. Slap her with my hairy salami while she's still yawning."
Make your own chicken wing song and put it in the comments... :)
Yo mama so ugly that she turned Medusa to stone.
One day, little Johnny and little Susan were in bible class. Little Susan had been tired that day, so she kept falling asleep. The teacher said to little Susan, "Who is our Lord and Savior?" Little Johnny poked her in the butt with a push pin, and she yelled, "Jesus Christ!" The teacher goes, "That's right, go back to bed." Then, the next thing the teacher asked was, "Who gave up their son for our sins?" Little Johnny poked her again, and she yelled, "God Almighty!" The teacher says, "That's right, go back to bed." The next question the teacher asked was, "What did Adam say to Eve after their 13th child?" Little Johnny poked her in the butt again. She yelled, "If you stick that thing in me again, I am going to break it in half and shove it up your own ass and see how you like it!"
Anybody know a girl named Candice? She just added me on snap.
Yo mama is so ugly, when she tried to join an ugly contest, they said, "Sorry, no professionals!"
Yo mama so fat that when the cashier at KFC asked her what size bucket she wants, she said "the one on the roof."
For dinner, this girl had noodles. The next day, she could not find her skinny sister. The mom said, "Your sister is dead!" sadly. The girl asked, "She was skinny, right?" The mom said yes. The sister laughed, "I ate her! That’s why the noodles were very skinny!"
Why can't orphans become criminals? Because she isn't wanted.
Yo mama so fat, when she skips a meal, the stock market drops.
Yo mama so slow, she took nine months to make the joke. Thank god mine only took 6.
So I got my sister shampoo for her birthday, and she stood there and threw her wig on the floor.
Your mama is so ugly, she walked by a TV and missed eight episodes.
Yo mama so hairy, she braids her eyebrows.
My aunt worked as a human cannonball.
I'm not sure if she was good at it until she got fired.