She jokes
A German soldier was walking down the street in a hail storm and a woman got hit unconscious. He ran over to see if she was ok. Other people came running over. They asked what happened, and the German soldier said, "Hail hit her."
So, I went up to an Australian girl. She looked like she was 20, and I said, "Can I have your phone number, sweetheart?" She said, "696969." I said, "Oh, haha, okay." A few days later, her mother called me and said she's 15.
What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball?
"Echhh!"
A man came up to a girl about to jump off a cliff. The man said, "Why?" She then replies, "There are many monsters in this world, and I am one of them."
Ur mum smells like shit, yeah, so she sucks a man off and washing machine. Yo, don’t at me, yeah, you chicken breath.
Your mom is so fat she ate an iPad and said, "Ahqah!" funny food mmm banana and hehe haha! And what deal with airline food? It's not white and it's not black and it's not Asian!? AHAH? DSF
Yo mama is so fat, when she walked past the TV, I missed three episodes.
Your mom is so fat, when she went to the ugly contest, they said, "No professionals."
The next woman who says she'd rather be alone in the woods with a bear, I'm throwing her in a pit with a bear and making her fight it with a wooden sword while drinking and singing "The Bear and the Maiden Fair."
Yo momma so delusional, she thought your grandma's Venus flytrap was Audrey II.
My friend said she wanted to fly, so I pushed her off a building.
Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because she felt peely!
What is black and white and red all over? A newspaper.
Bitch: Nice eyebrows.
Me: Yeah, where's yours, motherfucker?
Bitch: (Realizing she shaved them off cause she thought it would look cool)
A delivery service called “Ross Deliveries” was known to be the best in town. They never got anything wrong. One day, Rachelle got a delivery, but when it arrived, it was all broken! How is this possible?
I never said which delivery service she used. Lol.
Q. Why did the cow cross the road?
A. Because he/she wanted to watch the moooovie.
Your momma so fat, when she asked for a water bed, she got a concrete bed.
Your mama is so stupid, when her phone died, she bared it, lol.
When that one night stand says she has AIDS but you laugh, "I choose D!"
She says...wait what?? I have all of the above! XD
Yo momma so stupid that someone said, "You're not that wealthy," and she went to a doctor.
Your mom is so fat, she fell down the Grand Canyon and got stuck!