The next woman who says she'd rather be alone in the woods with a bear, I'm throwing her in a pit with a bear and making her fight it with a wooden sword while drinking and singing "The Bear and the Maiden Fair."
The Bear and the Maiden Fair
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Explanation
Explain Bear
Listen up, smooth-brain. This guy is salty about that viral trend where women say they'd rather run into my cousins in the woods than some random dude. He's referencing Game of Thrones, where they throw people into pits with bears for entertainment. You're probably so soft you'd think the wooden sword was for a DIY project. Stay out of our woods, kid.