How does an Alabama mother know when her daughter is on her period? She can taste the blood on her son’s dick.
If you can make a woman laugh, you're almost there.
If you're almost there and then she laughs, then you've got a whole different problem on your hands.
Stop joking about Helen Keller so much! It’s rude, poor woman! You all just wait till she hears about this!
Your momma is so old she has been a waitress at the last supper.
As a brother, I have to report my sister has a few new symptoms that are going around, and those symptoms are that she has big titties, a sweet pussy, and a great personality.
A kid asks his mom what dark humor is. She says, “You see that man with no arms, tell him to clap.” “But mom I’m blind!” says the kid. “Exactly,” replied the mom.
Why was it so hard for the pirate to call his mom? Because she left the phone off the hook!
"I work with animals," the guy says to his Tinder date. "That's so sweet," she replies. "I like a man who loves animals. Where do you work?" "I'm a butcher," he says.
I dated a girl, and I didn’t know she was previously in an abusive relationship.
I thought she just REALLY hated high-fives.
"I told my mom I thought parenting got easier as the kids get older, and she laughed so hard she cried a little."
When your teenager asks for personal space and you remind her that she came out of your personal space.
Yo mama so fat then when she went on the scale it showed her phone number
Yo mama so fat then when thanos snapped his fingers she was still their
Your mama is so fat that when she went to scale its said no elephants aloud
Put Helen Keller in George Floyd's position. How would she cry out for help? Would she just moan, or would she try to do sign language?
"Yo mama's so fat that when she farts, Al Gore accuses her of global warming."
"Yo mama so skinny when she swallowed a meatball, everyone thought she was pregnant again."
Yo mama's so old, she was a waitress at the Last Supper.
Yo mama's so fat, she was overthrown by a small militia group, and now she's known as the Republic of Yo Mama.
Yo mama’s so stupid, she climbed over a glass wall to see what was on the other side.
