Sex jokes
Jack and Jill went up my ass to eat a big dildo, but Jack died cause he got hit by a brown thing.
What's the sound that dwarfs make when they have sex?
Broken plates.
YOUR MOM sucks my dick 24/7.
When fat people smash, it must feel like a huge submarine hitting you.
It's impossible to rape a rapeist because rapeists want sex.
What is the difference when I have my dick in your mouth or when you have yours in mine?
Oh, I forgot, you don't got one, bitches, suck my dick.
Do you think you can solve a riddle about my penis because I don't think you can...
It's too hard.
You smash me so hard, I gave her the D.
So I found out a rainbow is basically where a guy ejaculates in a female's mouth and she swallows her period juice and they both kiss each other, swishing it together in each other's mouth, and it forms a rainbow.
And a strawberry shortcake is basically where a dude ejaculates on a female's face and then punches her in the nose, causing her to bleed. That's why it's called a strawberry shortcake.
There was a woman named Sally. She loved to have sex with other people. One time, she had sex with me. I noticed her bra size was 69 (+69). That is fucking big!
Ok, then when her partner was pissing, he told her she should call the doctor. So she dialed 2063512000 (+2000) and called the doctor. The office was on 51st street ave NE (+51). Holy shit, the doctor said! The boots were so big that she had to take 8 pills (x 8). The next morning, she was ________.
69 + 51 + 2000 x 8 = 16120
58008 (flip calculator)
Boobless.
Dang... if I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put D IN U ;)
I only know there are 25 letters in the alphabet, I don't know Y.
(Me: How many letters are in the alphabet?) -- (Friend: 11- T-H-E-- A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T)
(Me: There are 20 letters in the alphabet, right?) -- (Crush: No, there is actually 26.) -- (Me: oooOoh, I forgot u r a qt! So its acdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz?) -- (Crush: You forgot the D) -- (Me: That's not needed yet ;])
What letter is really hot? T
C = cOCK O = CoCK C = COcK K = COCk COCK = cock cock = COCK
ME SExUAL SRrY LoL
Why won't an atheist convert to the religion of Islam? Because being on the sex offender list is the only requirement to be a Muslim according to the Arabic religion of Islam.
Roblox Brookhaven be like:
"ABC if you wanna be adopted."
"ABC if you wanna be my friend."
"ABC if you wanna be a banker."
"ABC if you wanna rob the bank."
"ABC if you wanna date."
"ABC if you wanna sex."
What's the best thing about a prostitute dying on you during sex?
The second hour is free.
My girlfriend who is a Jehovah's Witness had sex with me so hard, she turned to Christianity.
How many times do you nut? It depends how hard you do it.
Girl lol feel dick in mouth on you.
Even though you are a meateater, you can still totally be a vegetarian.
My parents told me that when they had sex, it was absolutely shambles.
Thankfully, it turned out that they were real balls.
What's the difference between a boy and girl? A boy always carries an average 5in "do not enter" sign.