Self jokes
What do you do when you see a kid alone? You beat them up and say, "It was self-defense!"
How do you know all suicide bombers self-identify as being old?
They are all boomers in the end.
Someone said to stop hurting myself, but I'm still trying to cut my arms off.
When I self-harmed one day, my mother told me that it cut her deep. We both found that very amusing.
What's an orphan's favorite flower?
A self-raising flower.
Did you hear they made an Emo-Hipster pizza?
It cuts itself, and you're supposed to eat it before it's cool.
What is a self-harm person's favorite game?
Fruit Ninja.
How do emo bands prepare for their shows?
They self-harmonize.
Among Us players after saying "Self Report!" to the police officers who find a dead body in their basement.
Why did the little girl flush herself down the toilet?
Because she wanted to join the Brownies.
I love myself.
Is skin picking self-harm?
Cause I'm red all over without a razor.
I am funny.
My friend was in a crash, so when he got put in a wheelchair, people bullied him, so I told him to stand up for himself.
I looked in the mirror.
1. just feeling sad. 2. depression. 3. self harm. 4. suicide.
Sister, you're ugly.
Other sister: I'm not your reflection.
PS. Sorry if it is not funny.
If you don’t know what introspection is, you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
I told myself I needed to stop drinking so much. But I'm not about to start listening to some drunk weirdo who talks to themself.
To anyone suffering from low self esteem:
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/UTymDoPOEnY