Self Jokes

Your momma is so ugly that she went out as her self for halloween

I was joking about self harm to my friend and she told me to CUT it out, I couldn't even laugh. When we were at the self checkout she started scanning my arms, I asked her what she was doing she said, ̈Trying to see if it beeps, ya think id get it to work if I scanned your thighs? ̈ I said, ̈Nah bro you'd overload the system if you put it there. ̈

my sister was hitting on my boyfriend im 11 shes 9 she said go f.ck ur self so i said : "ok thanks for the idea"

Why do people in wheelchairs get bullied Cause they can’t stand up for them selfs

Wow aiden maybe you been mean to Tenya she is hurting close to killing her self but hey I can pick your ass since ya know that is what I do!

Ama is a bitch I want him to die and kill him self

What kind of flour do orphans use to make bread?

Self-Rasing.

The school shooter points the gun at the emo kid while the shooter tries to shoot him the emo kid dodges the bullets like the matrix and takes the gun away from the shooter and shoots him self.

I looked at your hairline, and when I saw you I thought to my self of the last time I was a baby

If an orphan took a photo what would it be called? A self me

what do you call an orphans family pourturte a self pourtit

What flavour do you buy an orphan? Self raising

Yo mama so ugly that when she turned on the tv it changed channels by it self

i asked my mom if i was adopted she said no why tf would i adopt you and i said im gonna kill my self and she also said make sure you do it right this time

A blonde crashes a airplane Officer: could you please explain to me what happened? Woman: It got so cold in the plane I turned the fan off. Officer: *face palms self* Also officer: Here's you sign