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Why did you always see Michael Jackson wearing two white gloves?
Because masturbation is against Michael Jackson's religious beliefs.
A skeleton walks into the hospital and said: "Doctor, Doctor, I broke my leg!" The doctor said: "I see..."
So I told my sister, "Want [to] hear some jokes?" and she was like, "Hit me with [your] best shot, fire away," and I was like, "Okay, I know [you're] singing an old song, yeah I was trying to see if [you] sing too," and I said, "Who do [you] think I am, Chris Brown?"
Why did the alligator see a crocodile?
Because it ate too many humans, and he was sick.
What did Melania ever see in Donald Trump?
$2 billion and high cholesterol.
One day, two Chinese people with broken English go to America. When they arrive, they go to a small place to eat. When they look at the menu, they see "hot dog," but since their English is bad, they think it's literally a roasted dog and order it. When it comes back, they're both surprised, and one of them asks,
"What part of the dog did you get?"
Why did the dog want a kiss? Because he can see his knees.
I miss seeing my friends and teachers.
"Yankee Doodle went to town riding on a computer screen, and then they can see the government has to get Chili's."
Roses are red, violets are blue, When I see you, I play with my poo.
When you're excited to finally see your sister, and then you realize she's wearing your clothes.
Doc: Can I help you?
Girl: Doctor, I have pain in my heart.
Doc: When did it begin?
Girl: Right now (seeing him like a doll).
Doc: Hh...do you like me? I know I am handsome...
Girl: No, don’t get me wrong. You just look like someone I know.
Doc: Who is that? Is your boyfriend?
Girl: No, it’s my pet (rabbit), his name is Rokie.
Why can't blind people have a seafood diet?
They have to see food to eat.
Guess what's "tiiiimmeeeee ABDE?"
....yes, it is "long time no see."
You wanna see a joke? Look in a mirror.
Where do cows go to see the big screen? The mooo-vie theater.
Three people die on the same day: a German, an American, and an Italian. They all go to Hell for various reasons.
American: "I won't ever see my dog again!"
Italian: "I won't ever make pizzas again!"
German: "Hey, granddad, how have you been?"
Me and my friend roasting each other.
Friend: You look like a baboon.
Me: Stop talking, you look like a gorilla, so I might call animal control on you and I'll be seeing you at the zoo!
High school students are also more interesting to see, but they are you on your way. Just kidding! 🤣
A lady comes into the boys' bathroom and a boy sees her.
"This is not a girls' bathroom," he says.
She answers, "I don’t care," she says, "I NEED TO PEE!"