What happens when water loses its bottom jaw?
It had a hurt o-chin (ocean)!
[God creating a jellyfish]
God: How about an evil bag?
I tried a pun about water, but people "sea" right through it, and when people complain, they are usually just being a beach.
Why is the sea salty?
Because the land never waves back.
How much does a pirate pay for corn?
A buccaneer!
Why did the sea cry?
Because it felt salty and blue.
Vladimir Putin, Donald Trump, and Angela Merkel are standing at the shore and are trying to impress each other with the accomplishments of their countries. Putin brags, "We have nuclear submarines which can stay underwater for six weeks without having to resurface!". Trump goes on, "Six weeks? That's nothing. I have the best submarines, they're underwater fĂźr at least three months!". Merkel is about to respond, when a giant steel colossus emerges from the sea. A hatch opens, a black uniform appears - "Heil Hitler! We need Diesel."
Don't tell a Titanic joke, or you'll sink to a whole new low.
Why did the mermaid want to go to the evil monster so it could get a real joke? Ha, ah, ah, ha!
Only Fortnite players will get it.
Where do you get salt water? Salty Springs.
I was going to tell a joke about emos in the sea, but itâs dead in the water.
What do you call the midget sea?
A pond.
I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very egg-citing, although, I was exaggerating, but, if you think that wasnât funny to you, then youâre hard-boiled. Thatâs all for today, yolks! So I said before several cats starting fighting, that sh*t was a catastrophe. These kittens were all like âYouâve gotta be kitten me.â Meanwhile, in the ocean, they just waved, see what I did there? You shore you didnât? Oh, alright, thatâs okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too deep for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had no body. Why didnât the skeleton ask the girl out? He didnât have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He boned her. No? Alright. Those didnât make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone.
Fishing and girlfriends are exactly alike. There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but until I find one, I'm stuck here holding my rod.
How does the sea say hello?
It WAVES you.
SEA what I did there?
I'm SHORE you saw it.
Don't be SALTY!
Why do Pirates say "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!"?
First time out at sea, they prepare for battle and say to their commander:
"The canons be ready, Captain!"
"Are," says the Captain (correcting their grammar).
"Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!" they all exclaimed!
What do you call 10,000 lawyers at the bottom of the sea?
A good start :)
The ocean didn't start smelling like fish until women started swimming in it.
So, the sea is on a computer but doesn't know how to search, so the computer said to the sea, "Search!"
Do you get it? SEArch.
Titanic was sinking.
Passenger: "How far are we from land?"
Captain: "Two miles."
Passenger: "Which direction?"
Captain: "Down."
