Sea jokes
A pirate walked into a pub with a ship wheel attached to his balls. The bartender says, "What the hell is that?"
The pirate said, "I don't know but it's driving me nuts!"
The Titanic was going through the ocean. Chuck Norris was on the ship, and they never crashed into an iceberg. He just shat off the front of the ship!
Why can't pirates play cards? Because they're standing on the deck.
What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just WAVED. Can you SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Why are you so SALTY? Don't be a BEACH.
I had a dream about the whole ocean being filled with orange soda.
Turns out it was a Fanta sea.
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay, they would be called bagels.
Where do boats go when they get sick? The dock.
Why are pirates called pirates? Because they arrrrrrrr!
Why do mermaids wear seashells?
They are too big for “B” shells, and too small for “D” shells.
you.
What do you call the place where an octopus is sitting?
Octopied.
Why do sharks swim in salt water?
Because pepper water makes them sneeze.
Why can't blind people eat fish?
Because it's sea food.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
What do you call 2 octopuses that look exactly the same? -- Identical.
Did you know that Iceland is only one sea away from Ireland?
3.14% of sailors are...
π-rates.
Why did the octopus blush?
He saw the bottom of the ocean.
What do you call an octopus that fights sharks?
An octobrave.
What did the mermaid wear for math class?
Algaebra.