How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two; one to screw in the lightbulb and one to SUCK MY COCK!
A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street and they come to a kid playing in a sandbox. The priest says, "Hey, you wanna go screw that kid?"
To which the rabbi replies, "Out of what?
Me: (pointing up in the air) "Everybody listen up, this is a robbery!"
Girl: "Dude, this is a library."
Me: "Oh." (screwing on a silencer)
I was with my blind friend, and he's telling me, "Yeah, I can read braille." So I hand him a Lego brick and ask him to read it. Apparently, Lego has been hiding a dark secret from us for years; as all their bricks read, "Screw you, asshole."
How many hookers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One, cause they'll screw anything
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite song?
Head, shoulders, screws, and bolts.
How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb it takes two but don't ask me how they get inside
Guy walks into the house carrying a sheep and says out loud this is the pig I screw when your on the rag and is wife replies that's not a pig its a sheep and he says I was talking to the sheep.
How many oz. of water does it take to screw a light bulb.
None, also what the heck are you doing with water when people in Africa don’t have any?
Crucifixion - only one guy who nailed it... at least Jesus didn't get screwed over, but I bet he was pretty cross about being forced to hang around.
how many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 5 4 to turn the table, and 1 to hold the bulb.
What does a robot do after a one night stand? He nuts n bolts
The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.
How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
To get to there other side!
How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
It's some weird number. You probably never heard of it.
How many dead prostitutes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
More than three because the basement is still dark!
How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just Juan.
