I was given my electronics test today. Turns out it was given to me 'cause I have the same name as someone who got 54/59. I actually got my hopes up, too.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they can’t get a home run.
What do you call two Latinos playing baseball one on one?
I rate my dad as a pilot 9 out of 11.
I was born and raised in Newcastle.
My grandfather used to tell me stories about Penaldo, a goblin from Portugal that travels to England when Newcastle is playing. He scores a tapin and then disappears until the next Newcastle game. I still have nightmares that he’s in our stadium.
Touch Down.
There was a recent football match between Ethiopia and Egypt.
Egypt 8, Ethiopia 0.
Why is the USA bad at Clash Royale?
Because they already lost 2 towers.
A scientist discovered water on Mars. Mars 1, Africa 0.
As an honest Penaldo fan, I have to admit he is a penalty merchant. He can only score against farmer teams like Spezia. He never shows up against great teams like Barcelona.
I've come to realize my hero Penaldo will never be better than Messi. My idol Penaldo is sadly finished.
What did the bowler say when the balls were on the lane and the pin? They said, "Strike!" 😂😂😂😂
South's losing to Broncos. 😹
What was the score to the African basketball game? It was 8-0.
You know that your grades are bad when you get a 66% on a test and your grade goes up.
I asked my wife if I was the only one she slept with. She said yes—the others were 7's and 8's.
My friend: Hey, I got 15 kills!
Me: I got 60 kills!
My friend: I didn't know you played Call of Duty!
Me: What's Call of Duty?
What happens when skeletons score points in a game?
They get a bone-us.
Q: Why are orphans bad at baseball?
A: They can’t find home.
9/11 wasn’t the date, it was the score.
WORLDWIDE RAP: Takin’ a Battery Park tour in Calgary, a Mali rapport and a factory in Lahore in an Annapolis store, Calgary's core, went to Nairobi’s floor and visited Valerie Moore, then bought some Shanghai decor and got salaries in Seoul’s war, studied the Vatican’s lore, wanted to see Manhattan’s allure and visit the Galilee shore to check Napoli’s score, a tragedy in Warsaw, Palmyra before, check out the cavalry corps, went to a Bali resort, a Madrid encore but had to take a Hackney detour.
