Scientist jokes
Have you ever stepped into Steven Hawking's House?
Neither has he.
Stephen Hawking, more like Stephens not walking.
Stephen Hawking was incredible at poker, he had no tell whatsoever.
What does a computer scientist do when someone tries to fight him?
He waves his arms like a space invader.
Heard Stephen Hawking is in a new movie and that the theme tune is absolutely banging. Think the opening line goes something like, “They see me rolling, they hating.”
So Stephen Hawking walks into a bar...
Why did Stephen Hawking not believe in God?
Computers don’t really have a specific religion.
Stephen Hawking couldn't make it to Heaven because there were stairs, so he rolled down to Hell.
Stephen Hawking is the fastest footballer ever--he could just charge up the Left Wing!
Stephen Hawking will be greatly missed for the time he walked this Earth.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite song?
Deja Vu.
Stephen Hawking's last words were, "Ethernet cable not detected, shutting down."
MAN 1) Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?
MAN 2) No.
MAN 1) Neither did he.
For Stephen Hawking, why is being drunk and having his power shut out the same?
He blacks out.
Yes, Stephen Hawking is alive.
YEET!
How did Steven Hawkings die?
His wife tripped over his charging plug when he was at 2% battery.
I invented a time-traveling machine and traveled back to Pangea. I warned the dinosaurs about the deadly asteroid. They told me, "It wasn't an asteroid... it was Pionel Pessi's penalty ball ricocheted from Mars that made them extinct." Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Pessi!
The reason Stephen Hawkings died is probably because he fell off his wheelchair, and he must've pressed shut down by accident.
What does Stephen Hawking eat for his breakfast, lunch, and dinner?
His shoulder.
What do you call Stephen Hawking when he eats too much?
As fat as Ben Dingley.