Scientist jokes
Stephen Hawking was incredible at poker, he had no tell whatsoever.
Stephen Hawking was a bit of a hardcase. He didn't let people push him around.
I'll tell you a good joke. Stephen Hawking went for a walk.
At least he always has a shoulder to cry on.
I love Steven Hawking's stand-up comedy!
Heard Stephen Hawking is in a new movie and that the theme tune is absolutely banging. Think the opening line goes something like, “They see me rolling, they hating.”
So Stephen Hawking walks into a bar...
Stephen Hawking is the fastest footballer ever--he could just charge up the Left Wing!
Stephen Hawking will be greatly missed for the time he walked this Earth.
Stephen Hawking's last words were, "Ethernet cable not detected, shutting down."
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite song?
Deja Vu.
MAN 1) Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?
MAN 2) No.
MAN 1) Neither did he.
Stephen Hawking couldn't make it to Heaven because there were stairs, so he rolled down to Hell.
Why did Stephen Hawking not believe in God?
Computers don’t really have a specific religion.
For Stephen Hawking, why is being drunk and having his power shut out the same?
He blacks out.
Yes, Stephen Hawking is alive.
YEET!
How did Steven Hawkings die?
His wife tripped over his charging plug when he was at 2% battery.
The reason Stephen Hawkings died is probably because he fell off his wheelchair, and he must've pressed shut down by accident.
I invented a time-traveling machine and traveled back to Pangea. I warned the dinosaurs about the deadly asteroid. They told me, "It wasn't an asteroid... it was Pionel Pessi's penalty ball ricocheted from Mars that made them extinct." Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Pessi!
What does Stephen Hawking eat for his breakfast, lunch, and dinner?
His shoulder.