Science jokes
Why did Stephen Hawking cross the road?
Oh wait, he didn't.
Stairs.
Stephen Hawking can't stand stairs.
Why do we name hurricanes?
To keep an eye on them.
What does a doctor do to make you better?
Helium.
I would have told you about a chemistry joke, but I wouldn't get a reaction.
Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?
No? Neither did he.
Did you hear about the song Rihanna wrote about the tin can?
It was called "S & N."
Why is a moon rock tastier than an Earth rock? It’s a little meteor.
Have you ever felt an earthquake? It’s not nature; it’s Brandan Bressler.
When you're sitting by the mushrooms and you hear one say to the other "Hey, you're a fun guy."
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo?
Head and Shoulders.
Why doesn’t the sun go to college?
Answer: Because it has a million degrees! 😀
"Did you guys make sure Stephen was plugged in?"
Stephen Hawking, more like ice cream!
Why does Stephen Hawking only do one liners?
He can't do stand-ups.
What does a skeleton call their great-grandparents?
A fossil.
Why is the ocean so salty? Probably because the land doesn't wave back.
What do / and \ have in common?
They have different results.
Do you know the teacher that went up in space? She had blew eyes. One blew this way and one blew that way.
There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.