What does a skeleton call their great-grandparents?
A fossil.
Science Jokes
The earth was once flat... until they buried your mom.
What’s black and at the top of a stair case?
Stephen Hawking during a house fire.
I was with my friend atom the other day. He’s pretty tall . . . Compared to you.
So big that when you step, you break the whole galaxy.
There's a new bird disease, it's called churpies.
It's a canariel disease, untweetable.
My wife is so fat, she gets weighed on the Richter scale.
Yo mama so fat, she found the barrier to outer space!
I heard helium won the lottery. Turns out, he lied.
What did the neutron say to the atom?
"Sandwiches, dude!"
Why couldn’t the dinosaurs talk? Because they were dead.
Did you hear that oxygen and magnesium hooked up last night?
OMg!
What do / and \ have in common?
They have different results.
I love Steven Hawking’s stand-up comedy!
What did the skeleton pull out from behind his ear?
Nothing. Skeletons don’t have ears.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite line in Rambo?
"Don't push me."
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Steven.
Can't you read? It says, "No Hawking."
Wipe your feet before entering, but in Stephen Hawking's case, it is "Wipe your wheels."
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and his wheelchair?
At least his wheelchair can pull a woman.
What does it say on Stephen Hawking's headstone?
R. I. P. Roll in Peace.
