School jokes
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Broken pencil.
Broken pencil who?
Never mind, it's pointless.
Why did the pedo cross the road?
To get to the pre-school on the other side.
My grades.
One day at school, I made fun of a girl who lost her hair from cancer, and my parents made me shave my head.
The next day at school, I made fun of an orphan.
Why do orphans not like 1st-5th grade teachers?
Because they have a home room.
Why can't an orphan go to a field trip?
Parent's signature: ___________
Why did Sally not come home from school today?
Because she got hit by a bus.
Why did Sally decide to fly to school?
She couldn't drive.
Where does Santa send his children to study?
The Elf-phabets.
You can always bully an orphan. Who are they gonna tell, their parents?
Little Johnny was overheard by his mother reciting his homework, “Two plus two, the son of a b*tch is four; four plus four, the son of a b*tch is eight; eight plus eight, the son of a b*tch...;” “Johnny!” shouted his mother. “Stop swearing!” “But mom!” Little Johnny protested, “That’s what the teacher taught us! And she said we should recite it till we learned it!”
The next day his mother went to the teacher to complain. “No, no,” said the teacher, terrified. “That’s not what I taught them. They’re supposed to say: ‘Two plus two, the sum of which is four.’”
What did the teacher say to the student?
Orange you glad to see me?
When the school shooter drops his gun, and the autistic kid picks it up thinking it’s his long lost nerf gun.
School was fun, but it was hard, almost like riding a bike that’s on fire and the grounds on fire and everything’s on fire because it’s hell.
Once at school, a teacher thought I was Russian. Why do you think that? I said. The teacher replied, because you're reading from Right to Left.
Why do gay people get bad grades?
Because they don't get straight A's.
I say 123, yeah, the kids bullied me, but they really don't know that my dad has a gun, yeah.
A kindergarten class is learning about the alphabet. The teacher asked, "What comes after M?"
Little Timmy reached into his backpack and yelled, "16!"
Whoever invented school, I hope you burn in hell.
When the school shooter enters the classroom and it's the quiet kid's dad.