School jokes
Teacher: Now class, if you are dumb, please stand up. Class: *no one stands up* Teacher: Oh c'mon. I know someone over here is dumb. *waves her finger around the left side of the room* Little Johnny: *stands up* Teacher: Oh, Johnny, you think you're dumb? Little Johnny: No, I just feel bad you're standing alone.
What's that stupid girl in your class called?
Thot.
Teacher: What is the capital of Washington?
Dumb kid: The W???
I will always remember the last noise I hear in my school, "oogga booga motherf***ers," click, boom!
Alright kids! Find a good place to stop! Then, out of the blue, Billy died. But hey, he went to a better place.
Dear algebra,
I don't want to find your X. I don't know Y she left you.
Why is calculus called calc? Because you need a calculator. Lol.
I live next to a kindergarten, and yesterday they had a fire drill. It was kinda weird because normally it's me who has a drill around little children.
Q: Where do smart hot dogs end up?
A: The honor roll.
What do you call an all-you-can-eat buffet for a pedophile? A school bus.
When you kill people in a war, it's perfectly fine, but when it's a school, everyone has a problem with it, wth.
What if some kid was like, "I'm going to shoot up the school!", and then someone just pulls up with a reverse card?
I was in Alabama last year. I walked into a store and noticed a couple kissing each other, and I said, "Excuse me, where is the bathroom?" The man said, "Right over there." I went into the bathroom and then heard the girl say, "Dad, I have to go to school soon."
Roses are red, I failed my test, All because of Hugh and his incest.
When you lose a game of Kahoot, so you kashoot up the school.
When the school lets you near children again...
I'm going to hang myself in the bathroom at school and put a note telling kids that I'm a piñata.
A child asks his teacher to go to the toilet.
"Before you go, recite the alphabet," the teacher says.
"a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z"
"Good, but where's the p?"
"Running down my leg."
A blind teenager who is bad at reading wants to go hunting, so he finds a hunting ground called s-ch-ool.
An American is lecturing a British person, saying things like "it's an elevator, not a lift" and "it's chips, not crisps" etc. After a while of this, the British person calmly retorted, "they're schools, not shooting ranges."