Say jokes
What did Santa say when he got to the club? Ho, ho, ho!
If you're pan, all you have to do is get a sibling and make them get your parents to the outside of the pantry, and you burst out and then say you're pansexual!
As a straight son, one day I asked my mom, "Have you ever quit something that you did before?" My mom said, "No, I never quit anything." So I asked my when you give a blow job you ever spit, then my mom said, "What did I say? Quitters are for spitters."
"Say what you want about the deaf."
Virgos are always virgins to age 17... Just saying.
What hates socialism but still uses roads, police, and says they support the military?
Dumb right wingers.
Here’s my hand, please hold it. That way I can say I was touched by an angel.
What did the grape say when the Meerkat stepped on it?
It said nothing, just let out a little wine.
What did the skeleton say when he fell on his funny bone? He laughed!
What did the porg say to the porg?
Hi Porg.
You're on worst jokes ever. You thought I put up a good joke? HAHAHAH!
What does it mean when there is a man in your bed, gasping for breath and saying your name?
It just means that you didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
Little Sally comes home from school one day and says to her mom, "Mommy, mommy, you won’t believe it! Little Johnny just pulled out his PP in class." The mother responded, "Well, what did it look like?" Sally said, "It looks like a peanut." The mother said, "Oh, it was small." "No, it was salty," said Sally.
I don't see why people say that emo kids don't like to hang out.
I've seen them hanging all day.
Student: Hey! Did you hear the joke about the three holes in the ground?
Teacher: No?
Student: All I can say about it is, "Well, well, well."
What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?
Get in the car.
One day, Little Johnny walks in on his dad getting dressed and asked, "What is that, Daddy?" Dad said, "Oh, that's my snake." The next day, Little Johnny walks in on his mom getting dressed and asks, "What is that?" Mom says, "That's my bushes." The next day, Little Johnny can't sleep, so he goes into his parents' room and asks Dad, "Why is your snake going into Mom's bushes?"
Why does everyone say there are mines in Bosnia? There are no-
What did the man say when he knocked down the bookshelf?
Looks like I've only got myself to blame...
A girl in the shop was getting bullied. She came to me saying, "I’m getting bullied." I told her, "Stand up for herself."
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
"Where's my tractor!"