Say jokes
A horse walks into a bar.
The barman says...
"Why the long face?"
When a fat person steps on a scale, it says: “To be continued.”
What did the shark say when he ate a clownfish? He said it tasted a little funny.
Q: What did the stop light say to the other stop light?
A: Stop looking, I’m changing!
What does Michael Jackson say when he gets hard? Ow!
What did the purple grape say to the green grape? "Breathe, you idiot, breathe!"
Get it?
My elderly relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying, “You’ll be next!”
They soon stopped though, once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
What did the other wave say to the other wave?
"Nothing, they just waved!"
What did one shoe say to the other shoe when they were fighting?
"I wanna sock in the eye so bad!"
I got a GTR yesterday, now my kids say, "GTR we there yet?"
What did the toaster say to the slice of bread? "I want you inside me."
When you tell her you are about to "COME," she says no, don't, please just keep going.
Shenron: THAT IS BEYOND MY POWER.
What do you say to your pony when it's being wild?
Stop horsing around!
My sister says, "Dad," and repeats it, and this is my dad: WOULD U STOP me? 😑
What did the rapper say to the broken vending machine?
"Yo, drop the BEAT!"
You know they say, when you get lemons make lemonade... Well, I took that a little bit too literal.
Turns out squeezing your wife's tits as hard as you can hurts them.
But at least lemonade came out!
It may be weird to let people smell your hair, but grab the phone as soon as the dwarf says your hair smells nice.
A man goes into a job interview and sits down.
The interviewer is looking over his resume and says, "I see here that there's a 4-year gap on your resume. What were you doing?"
The man says, "Oh, that was when I went to Yale!"
The interviewer is impressed and says, "That's great! You're hired!"
The man smiles. "Really? I'm so glad, because I really need this Yob."
What did the cops say when someone called him racist?
"How can I be racist? My wife's eye is black."
Tell someone to spell "Icup."
Answer: It will say, "I see you pee!"