I was wearing a mask and told the teacher I ate her vagina. She said what? I pulled my mask down and said, "No, I said I like your hyenas." Then a kid sees me do it, but he only heard the first part, so he goes up to the teach and says, "I'ma fuck you tonight." She said, "Pull your mask down," and he pulls his mask down and says, "I'ma fuck you tonight."
Say Jokes
A pirate walks into a tavern with a pirate ship attached to his nutty wuttys. It's driving me nuts!
A troll proceeds to pull out a desert eagle and shoot the pirate in the face. He makes a poggers face and says, "Problem??"
Why did the first boob say to the 2nd boob: "Between us, I have to take a tit."
Roses are red, I'm off the grid,
John Cena accidentally says "you can't see me" to a blind kid.
Say "Uranus" but take out the "ur."
What did the plane say to the twin towers?
Wanna play Jenga?
What did the fork say to the spoon?
Nothing, forks don’t speak, silly!
When you ask your brother where his hairline is, and he points where it's supposed to be, and you say, "I don't see one there."
Huh what you say?
Come fight me, suck a dick.
What did the hairline say to the hat?
"We go way back..."
During the Great War, a man holding a machine gun shoots down a swarm of soldiers running on a swamp.
He says: "You came to the wrong swamp, Americans! You came to the wrong swamp!" *He didn't stop firing.*
They say the polar ice caps are melting, good, because my wife's a fat, cold bitch.
If your wife says: “What would you most like to do to my body?” “Identify it” is the wrong answer.
Some people could say that the sky was falling that day,
one second they saw the sun and the next they saw heaven.
What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?
Dam.
What did the retard say when the water too deep?
"Deep deep."
I'm about to say this but.....
*whentheimposterissus*
Why does an orphan cry when we say "ur mom?"
Because they have no mom.
You tell your dad what one plus one is and he says five. You forgot that your dad's brain is on the floor.
Yo mama is so fat that when she steps on a scale, it says "to be continued."
