Say jokes
What did Bob the police officer say to his chest?
"You're under a vest."
Waiter says, "Sir, we ran out of ranch, so I had the boys in the back improvise. But don't worry... It has even more zip & twang to it!"
What did the bee say to the other bee?
Moo.
What did the man say when his girlfriend threw sodium and chloride at him?
That’s assault!
What do you say to your partner with diabetes?
Hey, sugar!
When you’re having the best sex in your life and your grandma says, “I’m not dead!”
Your Roblox friend counts to 10, but she doesn't count to "too." Then Roblox says: "Damn. Your Roblox friend can't count."
What did Andrew Tate say to the fat kid?
"I miss you."
What did the toaster say to the bread?
"I want you inside me!"
An Asian gets a choice between his rice cooker or his son. He instantly picks the cooker and says, "He got a B+ in maths last week; he's a failure!"
What did the mongol say to his dog?
Down syndrome!
What did the farmer who lost his tractor say?
*waits 25 seconds*
"I lost my tractor!"
During the Great War, a man holding a machine gun shoots down a swarm of soldiers running on a swamp.
He says: "You came to the wrong swamp, Americans! You came to the wrong swamp!" *He didn't stop firing.*
Huh what you say?
Come fight me, suck a dick.
What did the hairline say to the hat?
"We go way back..."
Little Red Riding Hood says to the wolf: "What a big dick you have!"
Wolf: "The better to f*** you with!"
"Does this make any cents?" a man says.
"Oh, it does make cents," me. <-- thing: Lemin"aid" <-- another joke.
When someone says don't talk back to me, say, "I wasn't aware that answering a question was considered talking back."
When you ask your brother where his hairline is, and he points where it's supposed to be, and you say, "I don't see one there."
When you see someone, you say, "Go suck bananas."