Say jokes
Dam, sometimes when I look at my friend's head, I say, "Dam, that's a dam big head, Nick." Then he is like, "Dude, that's a literal dam."
A guy says to his dog, "Where are you?" The dog was actually dead, bro.
What did the triangle say to the circle? Ur mom.
If a girl says no twice 🤔.
Mathematically that’s a yes, so you’re good to go!
Say "I cup" but in words.
Memes
What did Nemo say to the emo?
"Be careful, you can't Nemo your way out of emo."
There were 3 Gay Fish in a Tank. One says to the others: "How do you drive this thing?"
Like this joke if you LOLed! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
An Asian walked up to another Asian that was crying.
He asked, "Is somting wong?"
The other guy says, "I was i a noh paking zon."
What did all the humans say when all the pets left town?
A doggone catastrophe!
This black dude goes up to an Indian guy and says, "What up brotha?"
The Indian guy gets offended and says, "We are not the same."
The black guy then pulls out a gun, and the Indian guy says, "Ok brother, ok brother, we are the same, we are the same."
Do the voice in your head.
I got barred from Weight Watchers today.
It wasn't my fault; it was the fat ass next to me who spilled her box of Maltesers onto the floor in the middle of the room. All I did was say that it was the funniest game of Hungry Hungry Hippos that I have ever seen.
If someone wears black, say, "If you see someone wears black, they always be emo."
What did the tomato say to the sad pickle?
"What's the big dill?"
What did Stephen Hawking say when he died?
Boo Boo Doo.
What do you say to an emo with a new haircut?
"Nice cut, G."
What did the steak say to the other steak?
What did the mouse say after its bath?
"I feel squeaky clean!"
What do you say to a bully?
I might not be perfect, but at least I'm not you!
What did the walrus say when they lost the remote?
"Walrus the remote!"
Bully: My mom says I'm not allowed to burn trash.
Me: (quiet)
Bully: HEY I'M TALKING TO YOU.
Me: Are you talking to yourself? Because I was listening to music until I heard you.