Surface jokes
Are you a mirror, because I see myself in you?
Hey.
Girl: Hey.
Damn, I forgot my spray bottle.
Girl: What?
It says "spray on flat surfaces."
"He scratched his face up, detective. That did it."
"Did I do that?"
When my friend fell, I didn't crack up, but the sidewalk did.
In the realm of the mind, Where thoughts wander undefined, This sentence emerges, unconfined, A whimsical phrase, quite inclined.
It dances freely, unrestrained, No structure, no rules, it's unchained, A playful verse, with words unfeigned, The first to surface, unrestrained.
It holds no grandeur, nor deep insight, Just a simple thought, taking flight, A fleeting notion, shining bright, In the realm of words, it feels right.
This sentence, unburdened and free, Plays with language, wild and carefree, A tiny poem, as small as can be, Yet it speaks volumes, silently.
So let it wander, let it roam, Across the page, it finds a home, Unfettered by rhythm, it freely roams, This sentence, the first, stands alone.
Why are basketball courts slippery?
Because the players dribble on it.
Dulux have created a new type of paint. It's called "Sue Grey." It covers up everything.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends, how hard can you throw them?
She needs a flat surface cleaner.
What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.
Why'd the rubber go flying across the room?
Because it got pissed off!
I had a conversation with a Möbius strip.
It was one-sided.
If I had a spray can, I would spray it on your ass. Because the instructions say to spray on flat surfaces.
Uranus caught a 3-meter flatty while surfing. Check the tail still kicking. Deadly, my bruz!
Sun.
The sun is fire.
Look - it's the lake of whiz!!!
Wow, that is so sunny!
Floor on the road?
What is black when it’s clean and white when it’s dirty?
Answer: A chalkboard.
Sans: Zzzzzzzz.
Papyrus: SANS, WAKE UP!!
Sans: What is it, dude?
Papyrus: A human has fallen from the surface world!
Sans: And you gotta BONE to pick with 'em??