Saw jokes

My friend looks more red than Mr. Krabs.

It’s weird, I could’ve sworn I saw the silhouette of a belt hurling towards him the other day.

Why do orphans like boomerangs more than their parents? The boomerang comes back.

One day I saw a kid cry, so I go, "Let's go find your parents." I miss my job at the orphanage.

Why do orphans get lost on boats? They can't find the home room.

I was riding my bike when I saw a man's head in the wheel. It was mine.

If mom saw you, she would die and be happy because of you being ugly.

My friend said he saw a blind man. I said, "Did he LOOK nice?"

Your hairline is so far back that when I put on my glasses, I thought I saw an "M" for McDonald's on your hairline.

Your sister is so stupid, when she saw Mountain Dew, she went to the top of a mountain to get it.

I saw a kid with no phone. I gave him an iPhone 14.

Except it had no home button.

I saw a helicopter fly. Next minute, I knew Kobe was on the news.

Your mom is so fat that when she saw Moby Dick, she said, "We are family... even though you're bigger than me."

I saw a girl crying. I told her, "Where are your parents?" She cried more after that. I got kicked out of the orphanage.

I saw an orphan on the road. I asked him if he's an orphan. The kid says, "Yeah, what gave it away?"

I say, "Your parents."

You're so ugly when a pig saw you, he said, "Yes, my brother is back."

I saw your mother get into a white Ford Taurus on the corner of Milton and Halliburton, and you're still trying to tell me she ain't got no job cause she "can't get a ride to work?"

I saw a girl at my job and we ended up fucking, then the test came back and I have hives from my sister.

We thought that my mother died in the best way possible, during her sleep.

But when we did an autopsy on her, we saw she actually died in the worst way possible. During the autopsy.

Fineman, Einstein, and Schrodinger walked into a bar.

Fineman says, "It appears we're inside a joke."

Einstein says, "But only to an observer who saw us walk in simultaneously."

To which Schrodinger says, "If someone's looking through the window, I'm leaving!"

"Don’t look! I saw you peeking through the window."

My friend was in Afghanistan when he saw someone got shot, and then they bombed him. Now he called them the "Talkwakers."

According to a recent poll, your mother said, "I like the guy who saw the guy who doesn't have a brain!"