Saw jokes

I saw an orphan and I said, "Yo."

He said, "What do you want?"

I said, "To be your new father."

"Really??!" the orphan said.

Me: Lol, no.

Orphan *Jumps into street*

One day, I saw a kid beating up a fat kid. But a cop came out of nowhere and threw the bully off him. The cop then asked the bully, "Why are you beating him up?" I responded, saying, "I'm fighting obesity; no children should suffer from diabetes and heart disease." Then, the cop pulled out a gun and fired, afterwards saying, "Well, how did I do?"

One day I was on my phone, then I got a text message from my girlfriend, "Hey, sexy boy, wanna hang out tonight if you know what I mean...?" Then I just stopped and froze. I read the message. I said, "Yeah, sure..." She replied really fast, "There's going to be a few people there, ok." But I didn't read the next message... She said, "Come right at 12:00 AM." But I didn't read it. I walked into her house, but I heard a strange noise like a moaning noise, and it sounded like HER!! So I hid behind the couch, and I looked through the open door and saw something I didn't want to see... Like for part 2 and comment if you want me to make another!!

I will never forget the moment when my father saw me masturbating. He said, "Son, what are you doing? I'm on a video conference - get out of my office!"

Roses are red, violets are blue. I thought Voldemort was ugly, then I saw you.

Well, I saw a stripper, and she was trying out bread.

There was a very lazy person. He saw a banana peel in front of him while he was walking... and he said: “Oh God, protect me from falling!”

What did the Twin Towers say when they saw the airplane?

Batter up!

Yo mama so ugly that when Hello Kitty saw her, she said, "Goodbye!"

You're so ugly when a pig saw you, he said, "Yes, my brother is back."

I saw two really tall guys. I walked up and said, "I didn't know we still have the Twin Towers!"

What did Daveon say when he saw a spider? "I'm Dave-on with this!"

What did the passengers of the plane say when they saw the airplane strip? Nothing, because it was not an airplane strip, but a tower.

I saw a man. I saw another man. And I saw another. Where am I? Comment below.

Why did Uranus say gross? Because he saw Uranus.

I was riding my bike when I saw a man's head in the wheel. It was mine.

The dear God created the man.

Then he created woman.

When he then saw what he had done, he took care of tobacco and alcohol.

My friend looks more red than Mr. Krabs.

It’s weird, I could’ve sworn I saw the silhouette of a belt hurling towards him the other day.

When was the last time you saw yourself in the mirror?

Why did the weatherman’s cheeks turn pink?

He saw the climate change.