Santa jokes
What do Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?
They both come while youβre asleep.
Why was Santa happy?
Because he had 3 hoes.
How did Santa feel when he got stuck in the chimney?
Claus-trophobic.
What nationality is Santa Claus?
North Polish.
What did Santa Claus bring Michael Jackson for Christmas? His elves! πππ
Memes
It's that time is year again!
Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa? Cause they make the toys.
Santa decided coal was too expensive, so he started putting shredded lettuce and mayo in naughty kid's lockers... he calls it the coal's law.
Why is Santa's sack always full?
Because he only comes once a year.
What's the difference between Chris Brown and Santa?
Santa stops at three hoes.
Your forehead is so big, you can fit Santaβs sack on it.
What do you call a person who's afraid of Santa?
Klaustrophobic.
Your mama so ugly, when Santa Claus came to her house and saw her, he said, "HO HO HOLY SHIT THAT'S ONE UGLY BITCH!"
What do you call a winter time contact?
A Santa Claus.
Why can't orphans celebrate Christmas?
Father Christmas left them.
Have you heard about the dyslexic devil worshipper?
He sold his soul to Santa.
Why does Santa not have any children?
He only cums once a year.
Yo mama is so ugly that when Santa came to the house and saw a picture of her, he died.
Why did Santa stop at three ho's?
Ms. Claus caught him.
Mother: "Sweetie, make a Christmas wish."
Girl: "I wish that Santa will send some clothes to those naked girls in papa's computer."
Why was Santa happy?
'Cause he has hoes.