Santa jokes
What is a pedophile's favorite job?
The mall santa.
Why don't Asian kids believe in Santa Claus?
Because they're the ones who made the toys.
Why don't Chinese children believe in Santa?
Because they're the ones making the toys.
What do Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?
They both come while you’re asleep.
Why was Santa happy?
Because he had 3 hoes.
It's that time is year again!
How did Santa feel when he got stuck in the chimney?
Claus-trophobic.
What nationality is Santa Claus?
North Polish.
What did Santa Claus bring Michael Jackson for Christmas? His elves! 😂😂😂
Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa? Cause they make the toys.
Why is Santa's sack always full?
Because he only comes once a year.
Santa decided coal was too expensive, so he started putting shredded lettuce and mayo in naughty kid's lockers... he calls it the coal's law.
Why did Santa stop at three ho's?
Ms. Claus caught him.
What do you call a person who's afraid of Santa?
Klaustrophobic.
Your forehead is so big, you can fit Santa’s sack on it.
What's the difference between Chris Brown and Santa?
Santa stops at three hoes.
Your mama so ugly, when Santa Claus came to her house and saw her, he said, "HO HO HOLY SHIT THAT'S ONE UGLY BITCH!"
What do you call a winter time contact?
A Santa Claus.
Why can't orphans celebrate Christmas?
Father Christmas left them.
Have you heard about the dyslexic devil worshipper?
He sold his soul to Santa.
Why does Santa not have any children?
He only cums once a year.