a fat girl was dancing on the table and i said nice legs she says you really think so and i say yes definitely most tables would of been broken by now
When my dad left he said he would bring back the milk but 20 years later he only came with my new sister and eggs. And I confronted him and he said "I used all the milk to make your sister"
i met a girl that was 6-5 and she fell on 9/11 and broke her arm, she really said ohh snap like a twin tower
I was swimming in a pool on my vacation when a fan of mine approached me. He said he wanted an autograph and gave me a pen to sign it. I accidentally dropped the pen in the pool. Suddenly Penaldo came out of NOWHERE and dived to save it, he said he always dives for pens.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Once my friend was saying something dumb and I was like I Campbell-eve you just said that.
I was reading the new and read that a kid killed his family and when they interviewed him he said he wanted to become Batman
I told my suicidal friends to stop posting suicidal memes they said they will stop soon
A young boy is stood on the top of a cliff crying. A priest approaches and says, 'why are you crying my son?' 'my parents just crashed the car off the cliff and died,' 'it's just not your day today is it' Said the priest, unbuttoning his flies.
I told a joke and some1 said "no one asked" then i said "no one would care to even ask"
Your hairline is so long when you finally found the length of your hairline you told it to some one and they said don’t give me your phone number
My girlfriend told me she used to be a Christian I ask her why she isn't anymore and she said she liked the name Christina better
I was at a restaurant and a waitress yelled "dose anyone know CPR" i said "i know the whole alphabet"everyone laughed and laughed well everyone except one.
when kobe's pilot hit the mountain he said "kobe"
i saw a cuban prisoner i asked why are you running from the cops he said IM FREE AT LAST.
I just watched a 9/11 documentary on a plane Man next me said you know we’re going to New York right I told him I just wanna know what I got into
I went to my sister room one day. I see a trophy, so I ask my sister how did you won this trophy my sister said to me the neighbors gave it to me because I gave out the best hand jobs in the neighbor. I guess my sister put her hands in good use.
A tiny psychic escaped from jail and the news said there a small medium at large.
I came home from school One day and told my cat a kid at school said I was an idiot and told me to go kick rocks so I did except I kicked him out him and I called him the idiot for not moving out of the way
Jeff did you hear ther making a film about Jimmy savile it’s a very touchy subject. Yeah I did Gary but did you hear the reviews on the bill Cosby film people said it was so boring it put them to sleep
