What did the fish say to the other fish? "You have a big butt!"
The other fish said, "We don't have butts......"
I found a child on the street homeless, and they were really nice, so I took them home. Then I said, "Who's better, Biden or Trump?" They said they support Trump. They are now dead in my basement and have been for 3 years.
I told my grampa hello, and I said, "Hope you die!" hahahhhhahahahahahhahahahhahaha
Why did the rapist not get sentenced?
Because rule 69 said so 🤣🤣
I saw a poor man and I gave him money, and he said, "Nope, I don't need money." So I gave him money, and he punched me for no reason.
My friend and I got into a fight. I looked straight forward and said, "Look me in my eyes!"
I was wearing a mask and told the teacher I ate her vagina. She said what? I pulled my mask down and said, "No, I said I like your hyenas." Then a kid sees me do it, but he only heard the first part, so he goes up to the teach and says, "I'ma fuck you tonight." She said, "Pull your mask down," and he pulls his mask down and says, "I'ma fuck you tonight."
Someone asked the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton why she lost the 2016 presidential election to Donald John Trump, and the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton said, "Because someone asked her what she would do for a Klondike Bar?"
One dog said to the other dog, "Man, it is hard sleeping on the floor."
The other said, "Really? I like my bed."
Yo mama's so dumb, her dad said, "You're driving me crazy," and she said, "I didn't know crazy was a place!"
God: Why is the teenager so short?
Angel: I don't know.
God: I said, "Strong as a bear!"
Angel: No, you said, "Ass hair."
God: No, I didn't!
This is about Gwen.
I don't know her, but people are just causing too much drama over one person who never said one thing to them.
A mouse said, "Who should put the bell on the cat?" Then all mice said, "The old one."
People have houses, but I don't have a house because I don't have parents, said the orphan.
A butt saw the toilet and said, "Shit, I'm sick!"
I’m back and have a joke my friend said!
Person 1: My brother's Halloween costume is so ugly.
Person 2: What was it?
Person 1: He went as himself.
My pansexual son was asked to form a sentence with a word "Carry" on his zoom class earlier on today and he said "Pessi was carried by Iniesta and Neymar to his Mickey Mouse UCL". He received a standing ovation. Children are our hope and I'm proud of the education system!
Guys talk to me is what the emo loner said, but seriously, talk to me.
My dad said not to touch this thingy called a gun, but I looked down that pole and pressed that thing, and now I'm in heaven.
So, there was this kid, and he went to a store and said to a person there, "I'm emo." Then the person told the emo, "Why the hell are you here? Shouldn't you be hanging in a tree somewhere?"
